I was taught, like many a “good girl”, to keep my tongue – to only share that which is positive, uplifting and of an edifying nature; to speak kindly at all times, without anger or malice – AT ALL TIMES! Hummm…
My anger has surely bested me on more than one occasion and speaking before truly thinking has been a fairly constant companion throughout my life. So this post is not in any way intended to imply that I have anything but continued patience to learn in the verbal control of my emotions.
However, the past few years have granted me a deeper understanding of the power of emotion especially when expressed verbally, not that that means I have better control, but I have a better understanding. I now realize that my emotions rule most of my expression, positive and negative, and very often the passion I express can be overwhelming to others. I confidently use the word passion and know that I have had a passionate nature – about anything of personal value – for my entire life. My passion has always been a factor in how others have perceived me – sometimes good, sometimes not but always part of who I am.
Learning to identify the things that trigger the expression of my passion/emotion is a lesson I feel I will never truly master. Being able to identify the push-point after the fact seems a skill I have down, but am still working on being able to see it before the emotion presses its way on out into open space.
I have found that when I speak my heart, from my heart, with as much kindness as I can muster, I am left with a feeling of contentment even if my words cause no affect to my advantage, I’m contented with my willingness to take the risk of bearing part of my soul, no matter how minor. And even when my words are tinged with anger, I am glad I have spoken them for in doing so, I have taken another step towards releasing the bonds that keep me from flying.
So, I will no longer turn away but will speak, hopefully out of love and in kindness, and I will speak from my heart and share my soul through my words and hope that those that hear my voice are able to see my Truth.