But another week is upon us and my working day-to-day continues as it has for the past ten years. I find it hard to believe that I have been in this job for so long and recall my thought at the start of many a year, that this one would be my last. That I would not be here for another holiday season but year after year, this is exactly where I am.
This coming year – 2011 – I feel will be different. I am coming to believe that I will actually break free from these chains and find somewhere that I can make a living that nurtures my soul or at least makes me glad to go to work each day. I believe that this is part of the change that is coming my way and it is a part that scares the shit out of me but it is one that I long for with every ounce of my being. My spirit has been stifled, my joy quashed and the desire to wake each morning simply gone. I dread setting the alarm each night knowing that at its ringing another day of the same begins and my countdown to the weekend once again commences in earnest.
So I welcome the change involved with my job – I am opening myself to the trials involved in such a large undertaking and I am willing the Universe to conspire on my behalf and bring to me what I need and what will truly feed my soul for the days and years to come. This is a big deal, me putting it out there, stating it in written and spoken word, those simple acts change everything.
And now I’m really scared but equally excited about the possibilities that may be before me.